if opposites attract why aren’t i covered in hot people right now

(via sniffing)



Thank you for letting me be fully clothed instead of being in a bikini and a cape, looking like a slut

I don’t know what kind of beach your “fully clothed” musty ass goes to take your monthly showers sis but around these parts, most women wear bikinis to beaches [like Bey in this gif] and there is nothing “slutty” about that. I’ll end the lashing here for your sake. I don’t do walk-in appointments.

(Source: floetcist, via beyoncebeytwice)

warning: DJ Khaled


I got a friend of a friend who helps manage a venue that booked Khaled a while ago. 11:00 PM, no show. 12:00 PM, no show. folks throwin shit at the stage. I think round 12:45 he shows up, spends ten minutes trying to get the crowd to chant his name, he plays two songs he had nothin to do with, walks off stage and somehow gets a drunk girl to follow him. they fuck in the elevator for less than a minute and Khaled leaves khum on the fuckin ground for the venue to clean up

(via beyoncebeytwice)


whenever white cooks on tv say “asian” it really pisses me off. what part of asia is your recipe from? malaysia? bhutan? japan? cambodia? y’all know 16 different french sauces but can’t name what kind of chinese/indian food you’re making. 

(via goddamnyourebeautiful)


You know most people think of the word weasel as a bad term, but have you ever looked at an actual weasel? Like, a real one?


awww :)




it’s so cute!




Oh god I just can’t-

And let’s not forget that the average weasel is also roughly the size of a banana. Because it clearly wasn’t adorable enough already

(via 01012012)